Positive Thinking

I want to tell a story about a boy, when he was 13

He was in secondary school. His friends always picked on him, because he was always angry and he was always so uptight. To vent out his anger, he made fun of people, and that made the situation even worse. It went on like this, until he was 15, when he met a friend who he was comfortable with, and he looked pretty calm. This friends of his was like him, an outlaw, who was not in the 'in' group. However, when he asked his friend how he dealt with it, his friend simply said:

"Life is unpredictable. All we can do is look at the bright side, and smile about it."

And with these words of wisdom, the boy started to look at the world in a different way. He found that, not all that he sees, is like what it seems. Something bad that happens to him, might not be bad at all, when conceived in a different way. Not getting something that he wants, might be a good sign for the future. And with this new, positive outlook, he was a lot happier, and little did he realise, his happiness made him a genuine friend to all, and in return people genuinely liked him too. Everytime when people ask, he can tell his story, because he survived the tale, and it made him a better person.

And I learnt from it as well...

There were a lot of things in my life that I wasn't satisfied with. At least, when I was younger. I did not have the liberty of going out much when I was young, because my parents were quite strict, and were quite protective when we were young. Naturally, the rebellious side of a boy would tell me to just ignore the advice and go out. However, when conceived in a different way, at that age, going out meant risks, dangers if you will. How many kids got mugged, or hit, or robbed of their money? How many had their life on the line? Yes, I didn't have the luxury of going out early, but at least I matured by not doing so.

Sometimes, parents get angry, because of their protectiveness. Parents would always do so, they are, well, parents. So the natural reaction would be to get angry, to sulk, to rebel. And yes, most of the time people rebel. But when they do, they don't see the rationale behind the protectiveness. All they know, as far as they are concerned, is that their parents do not understand them, and their parents are angry. What they fail to see, is that the parents do understand, and that is why they are so strict about it. If the kid has a positive outlook, being angry might not be the obvious reaction. In fact, it opens opportunity for a lot more discussion, or at least a chance for the kid to justify himself. If the parents act is looked upon positively, the kid might not get what he wants now, but he matures due to the incident.

What about friends?

Yes, sometimes friends say something that we don't like. Maybe a friend likes to pick on you, sakat you if you will. Sometimes your friend is just trying to be friendly to you, and it takes a positive mind to see this. If not, you might conceive that your friend is trying to attack you, personally. Most of the time, this might not be the case right?

Sometimes, even the worst situations, if looked upon positively, can do us a lot more good than bad. Imagine if you failed an exam, (or almost failed). The normal response is that "I'm dumb! I'm stupid!". This might not be the case. You might be a bit slow, yes, but you are not dumb. If you are positive about it, even if you fail, it might be an indicator that you need to study harder, or not at the last minute, or study seriously. Or study in a different environment, or study with a different technique. There is always a reason why God gives you hardship. As said by a friend of mine earlier on in life, "God will not give you what you cannot handle".

What about if we get something, how do we get positive about that? Or more precisely, how do we not be negative about it? For example, imagine if you finally got together funds to buy yourself a new laptop. Sometimes, material things can change people, in which he will boast of his new product, or that he got to buy it cheap, or he starts to compare with other people. In this case, your 'niat' must be correct I guess, so that you don't get all negative and piss people off. If the intention is to use it to help you do your work, and not boast around and tell people that you have a good one and they don't, then you will have a better outlook and therefore would have a better outcome. Trust me.

Other examples? Sometimes we get a bit more money than other people. We are financially more secure than others. That does not mean we have to boast around and show off that we have a lot of money. If we get a king's paycheck it doesnt mean that we have to live like a king, and it doesn't mean that we have to live like a pauper either. In fact, a more positive approach would be to just keep quiet, and if you can help, you help people, financially. It does not mean, however that you should splash your money on other people until it puts you in a rut that you can't get out of. Taking the middle road is the key.

There are, sometimes people who are more beautiful than others, more 'macho' than others. Similarly, a positive outlook can apply here. So what if she is more beautiful than you? You might have more genuine friends. You might be a lot more genuine in friendship yourself. You might have more respect, because you know who you are and you are humble about it. Similarly, what if you are more beautiful than others? Does it gives you the right to boast around? Remember, beauty comes with a price, both financially and personally. If you are beautiful but you lack values, attitude, and most probably, happiness, would you like that? Think about it.

All i am saying, is that in life, put it bluntly, s**t happens. All the time, we will feel hardship, but remember, God is fair, and God is the fairest of all. All hardships has its benefits, and to get through and see why God gives us hardship, we need to be positive about it. If we can see the 'prawn in between the rocks', InsyaAllah, we will have a happier life, and we can control our stress more. Who knows, laughter might be the best medicine after all, as it is the positive of all positive acts.